Quotable Homer Simpson on Prayer

Like many others as they begin the New Year, I am resolving to improve my prayer life. I am starting with committing to the Divine Hours for two weeks for morning and evening. For lunch, I will read a devotional on the Rule of St. Benedict. (I know people generally don't make these kinds of commitments for just two weeks, but when you have an adhd brain, it can be....Hey look! there's a bird out the window!)

I also will turn to Homer Simpson a time or two for inspiration, shall we say. The Simpsons is my favorite TV show, and it always leaves me laughing, sometimes so hard that I'm crying. I love the satire, which also was used by Jesus (think parables, for instance).

Because the best comedy always is rooted in truth, I think it's good to take time to listen to the comedians. I know books and articles have been written about the Gospel and the Simpsons - even CT featured Ned Flanders on its cover - but its fun sometimes to get the information from the original source. I've included here some of Homer's quotes on prayer and some of his "prayer life." Later this week, I will feature the theological wisdom of Homer Simpson.

May we have ears to hear. After all, as Homer says, "...there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us."

HOMER IN and ON PRAYER

Dear God, just give me one channel.

Good drink ... good meat ... good God, let's eat!

Homer: God, if you really are God, you'll get me tickets to that game.
[doorbell rings]
Ned Flanders: Heidely-ho, neighbor. Wanna go to the game with me? I got two tick--
Homer: [slams the door, looks heavenward] Why do you mock me, O Lord?

Hey Flanders, it's no use praying. I already did the same thing, and we can't both win.

And Lord, we are especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is. Except for solar, which is just a pipe dream.

God : Thou hast forsaken My Church!
Homer : Uh, kind-of ... b-but ...
God : But what
Homer : I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
God : [pause] Hmm ... You've got a point there.

Lord help me, I'm just not that bright.

Dear God, give a bald guy a break.

Group for shy people

I noticed on Craig's list that there is a group for shy people that meets together about once a month here in Chicago for dinner, coffee, etc.

I would think that would be a difficult group to pull together.

They are meeting at Ann Sather's next month, though, so I just might join them. (In my best homer simpson voice) - mmmmmmmmmmm cinnamon rolls.

Heathen make great Christian films

So why don't more Christians?

The question is explored at Godspy.com in an article by Thom Parham. The article includes the following:

"If you want to send a message, try' Western Union," said Frank Capra, a Christian who made hugely popular mainstream films. Film excels at metaphor—forging a connection between dissimilar objects or themes. It doesn't fare as well with text messaging. Show, don't tell, is the rule of cinema. Christians, however, can't seem to resist the prospect of using film as a high-tech flannel board. The result is more akin to propaganda than art, and propaganda has a nasty habit of hardening hearts.

What other faiths think of Jesus

Bill Tammeus at the Kansas City Star has a column on how other faiths view Jesus.

Jews speak up for "Merry Christmas"

STATEMENT BY DON FEDER AT JAACD PRESS CONFERENCE - "Jews For It’s OK To Say ‘Merry Christmas'"

Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Don Feder and I’m the president of Jews Against Anti-Christian Defamation. Our organization was founded to provide a Jewish response to anti-Christian bias in the news media, entertainment, government and the culture.

Our board of advisors includes distinguished rabbis, scholars, academics, authors and communicators.

Let me anticipate your first question today: What on earth are we doing here? Why would a group of Jews - who don’t celebrate Christmas - care about the disappearance of Christmas?

Because Christmas is disappearing from our culture, at an ever-accelerating pace - disappearing from stores, disappearing from schools and disappearing from the public square.

Because this is an overwhelmingly Christian nation and it’s a matter of simple courtesy to acknowledge a holiday celebrated by 96% of the American people. Would a Christian living in Israel be offended if someone wished them a Happy Hanukah? Based on population, America is more Christian than Israel is Jewish.

Because religion - all religion which teaches God and morality -- enriches our society, instead of diminishing it.

Because Christmas is part of the fabric of American life, from the earliest settlements on these shores, to the delightful 1897 New York Sun editorial (addressed to a little girl named Virginia), to the troops who celebrated Christmas in Europe and the Pacific during World War II, to classics like "Miracle on 34th. Street," to the Americans serving in Iraq today.

I believe Christmas is under attack primarily for three reasons.

First the tyranny of the hypersensitive -- who’ve decided that they have an inalienable right not to encounter beliefs or symbols different from their own.

But this is supposed to be a democracy. When exactly was a militant and perpetually aggrieved minority given the power to censor the majority religion?

Second, some over-zealous officials have taken it upon themselves to re-interpret the First Amendment to exclude any public recognition of Christmas. But the Supreme Court has never held that Christmas carols or Christmas decorations in schools, or community Christmas trees or Christmas parties are unconstitutional.

Of course, if the politically correct posse can’t get you on constitutional grounds, they always have "sensitivity" or "inclusiveness" to fall back on.

Finally, I believe, there’s a subliminal urge on the part of the cultural elite to undermine America’s Judeo-Christian ethic. By purging public celebrations (or even acknowledgements) of Christmas, they hope move us further down the road to a spiritually sanitized - and spiritually bankrupt -- America, one divorced from biblical values.

Christmas is a subtle reminder that Americans are people of faith.

Jews Against Anti-Christian Defamation is here today to say "enough, already!"

If you’re offended by a municipal Christmas tree or Santa in a holiday parade or a manger in a park - Get over it. There’s a lot that offends me. That doesn’t give me the right to ban it.

If you’re a public-school administrator who thinks Christmas carols or decorations are in violation of the First Amendment, read the Constitution - even in light of the Supreme Court’s current distortions thereof.

If you’re a retailer who does 20% of his business during the Christmas season, and you won’t even acknowledge the holiday that’s enriching you - well, you deserve to lose that business.

The war on Christmas should matter to all people of faith - and all people of good will.

Good News for Cheasters

Cathleen Falsani, the religion writer for the Chicago Sun-Times and a good one at that, has a wonderful column of encouragement for Cheasters - those people who attend church only on Christmas and Easter.

The article begins:

You know who you are.

Twice a year, you find yourself in unfamiliar and discomforting surroundings in a church pew, on Christmas and Easter.

You try to blend in, try to remember the words to the hymn, when to stand, when to sit, when to pray, how much cash to toss into the collection basket, and which way the sign of the cross goes. (Remember: Spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch.) (Scot McKnight recently posted on his blog his practice of making the sign of the cross, but didn't include that helpful hint)

Twice a year -- out of a sense of obligation, guilt or nostalgia, to keep the family peace, to find some inner peace, to sing the carols from childhood -- you drag yourself to the Midnight Mass or the Candlelight Hymn Sing or sung eucharist or morning worship service. On Christmas and Easter.

She offers a few excellent hints to Cheasters, including

--Bring guests: Bring a friend or family member with you to worship, as your regular absence likely will be forgiven if you have a fresh face in tow.

--Bribery is good: Bring a bagful of small stocking-stuffer-type gifts or, better yet, baked goods, to hand out to the pastor and staff. Chocolate covers a multitude of sins.

--On eye contact: Church ladies can smell fear. If you look sheepish about being there, they will feel the need to comfort you. If you smile too big and feign recognition, a socially awkward moment is sure to follow. If you make eye contact, smile confidently, and slowly pan the room.

Most Inspiring Person

Voters at Beliefnet have eschewed the big names and voted for a little known person to be the most inspiring person of 2005. Victoria Ruvolo outpolled the likes of Bono and Rick Warren, who didn't make it to the finals.

It is refreshing and dare I say hopeful in a "Christian" sense that it was the relatively unknown with no media machine behind them who proved to be the most inspiring. (That is not to say all the people on the list weren't inspiring).

As Beliefnet says,

The three finalists selected by our readers Alex Scott, David Rozelle, and Victoria Ruvolo have one thing in common: Each was an “ordinary” person who, when faced with difficult circumstances, did extraordinary things. Each exhibited qualities we wish we had, but fear we don’t.

The cost of motherhood

Slate magazine is running a story on a study that says women in their 20s can dramatically improve their lifetime income potential by delaying having children even a year. The story comments on the methodology as well as the findings. I have no way of judging this story or study but found it interesting.

Creating DNA out of almost nothing at all

The San Diego Union has a well-written article on the incredible promise and terrifying possibilities that come with "synthetic biology. The first graphs are below:

For decades, biologists have modified plants and animals by snipping genes from one organism and popping them into another in a process called genetic engineering. Corn will produce its own pesticide – a toxin harmful to caterpillars – when spiked with a bacterial gene. And copies of the human gene for insulin have been slipped into bacteria, transforming them into biological drug factories and reducing the need to extract the hormone from slaughtered pigs.

Until recently, those useful genes had to be found in nature and transferred from one organism to another. Now our ability to manipulate biology to suit our needs has taken a startling new turn. Scientists are using custom-designed DNA, synthesized from scratch, to create novel biological "circuits" they hope will do anything they can program them to do.

Their goal is to plan new biological tasks, such as detecting pathogens and rendering them harmless, with the kind of precision and control exercised by designers of electrical circuits. They call themselves synthetic biologists, and they have set out to engineer life.

Is this a good idea? The goals sound promising: create tiny packets that travel through the bloodstream to find and treat diseased cells, design cells to generate replacement organs or bridge a severed spinal cord, weave high-tech fabrics of proteins from spider silk.

These possibilities have arisen largely from technical advances over the past few years that have made chemical synthesis of DNA relatively inexpensive. Custom-designed DNA is available by mail and can be ordered through the Internet. Researchers specify the sequence of the gene they desire and pay as little as a dollar per letter of the genetic code.

The problem is that the sequences of dangerous things, such as the virus that caused the 1918 influenza pandemic, are public knowledge. Some worry that a renegade group of synthetic biologists could unleash something horrifying.

"In an overall sense, the security situation is grave," said Roger Brent, president and CEO of Molecular Science Institute in Berkeley. "One can re-synthesize flu. The people who call themselves synthetic biologists didn't bring this situation about, but they bear some measure of the responsibility for keeping us safe."

Christian professor runs for Congress

Though I love living in Chicago, this is a reason I wish I lived in Wheaton, IL. Lindy Scott, a professor at Wheaton College is running on the Democratic ticket for the 6th District. He is running on a consistently pro-life platform. His views are similar to those one might read in books by Ron Sider or Jim Wallis.

Tookie williams, Arnold and Atonement

In denying clemency for Stanley Tookie Williams, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger discussed issues of atonement and redemption, which have been at the heart of most pleas for the execution to be halted.

"Stanley Williams insists he is innocent, and that he will not and should not apologize or otherwise atone for the murders of the four victims in this case," the governor wrote.

"Without an apology and atonement for these senseless and brutal killings, there can be no redemption."

In addition to insisting his innocence, Williams also has refused to help law enforcement officials with information that could help lead to the arrest of gang members. Williams has written books encouraging kids to stay out of gangs and donated profits to charities working on those issues.

Is Arnold right that there is no redemption without apology - and atonement." Is writing the books and donating the profits atonement?

If the governor is right, how does this fit in our daily lives and the sins we commit against one another? Do we practice it.

Steps 8 and 9 of the Twelve Steps include making a list of all the people a person has harmed and then making amends whenever possible. This is considered an essential step in recovery and redemption.

Your thoughts?

mental illness and crime

As a person with a bipolar disorder, I cringe every time it is reported that a person who has committed a crime or presented a threat to others has a mental illness. The latest case to hit the news is the story of Rigoberto Alpizar, who was shot by an air marshall. I know the stories will only cement the myth that those of us who suffer with a mental illness are bound to be violent.

Some facts:
1 in 4 families have a member diagnosed with a mental illness.

Illnesses such as bipolard disorder (BPD) vary in severity. Many of us never suffer psychosis.

Mental illness most often can be successfully treated.

People with a mental illness do commit serious crimes but are no more likely to commit a violent crime than those without a mental illness. I never have nor desired to commit a violent crime and neither have my friends with BPD. I don't fault the media for mentioning the mental illness as a possible element of the committing of a crime because that is a fact in the story. They just should be ready to write stories that mention what I have written below.

People with a severe mental illness are far more likely to be victims of crime than perpetrators.

Our social welfare and judicial system is in near total disarray - as reported by a number of government commissions. The result is that many don't get the treatment they need. The move from keeping people in hospitals and depending on community health systems has been a disaster. Some people need to be hospitalized - and there are good hospitals when properly funded. The community health centers, where the de-hospitalized are supposed to get treatment are severely underfunded.

We have de-hospitalized but not de-institutionalized people with severe and persistent mental illness. They simply are now in prisons. The Cook County Jail and the Los Angeles jail are among our largest mental health institutions. Many of these mentally ill people would not be there if given appropriate access to treatment.

Our justice system has a nearly impossible standard to meet with an insanity defense, which is irresponsible. Andrea Yates, the Texas mother who drowned her children, still believed Satan lived within her and yet was described as mentally competent to stand trial.

Yates's psychiatrist had prescribed haldol, an extremely powerful drug which generally is given as a last resor, when he should have tried newer meds. Then he abruptly took her off haldol without gradually reducing her dosage and without replacing it with another drug . What Yates did is not a total surprise given the known reactions people have when taken off haldol in the manner mentioned above. Now she is spending the rest of her life in prison.

When a doctor immediately took me off a set of meds and immediately switched me to another set, I suffered mild hallucinations and night terrors.

People, with mental illness often stop taking their meds at least once. Reasons vary. When a person is "normal" again, it is easy to forget the damage (not necessarily violence) that the illness has caused the person physically and socially. Many of the meds have side effects such as impotence, severe weight gain that can be more than 100 pounds in a year or two, nausea and/or tremors. (my hands sometime shake, and people have asked me if I am having alcoholic tremors). These often cause people to stop. (These are not excuses! Just reasons that others should understand).

Most people are not properly diagnosed for 5 to 10 years. Then it is hard to find a right combination of meds, and that combination can need changing. It has taken me several years and I just changed the dosage on mine.

This is something of a rambling post, I realize, but people need to understand that those with a mental illness that is not properly treated do suffer, and that having a mental illness does not make us criminals.

$3 billion so you can watch digital

George Will has an excellent column on Congress' plan to allocate $3 billion to help people buy digital converter boxes so they can watch TV in 2009.

Discovered new music site

I was excited recently to find a music site - Pure Music - that takes artists seriously and has great interviews - avoiding all that "People," "Entertainment" magazine shallow garbage.

Pure music has excellent reviews of artists whose music is well known and obscure. But the interviews are a highlight.

I am a big fan of Buddy and Julie Miller and there is an excellent interview from 2001 that still is equally relevant today. Julie wrote and sang the most beautiful and aching gospel I've every heard.

Among the interviews are
Pierce Pettis (A Bob Smietana favorite).
Allison Krause
John Gorka
David Wilcox

(An aside--you can listen to clips from all the buddy and Julie CDs at their website as well as view all their lyrics. The store isn't working yet, but until then, go to Amazon by using the link at Brad Boydston's site. His church benefits)


Lyrics to Broken Things:

You can have my heart
Though it isn't new
It's been used and broken
And only comes in blue
It's been down a long road
And it got dirty on the way
If I give it to you will you make it clean
And wash the shame away

You can have my heart
If you don't mind broken things
You can have my life if you don't mind these tears
Well I heard that you make old things new
So I give these pieces all to you
If you want it you can have my heart

So beyond repair
Nothing I could do
I tried to fix it myself
But it was only worse when I got through
Then you walked into my darkness
And you speak words so sweet
And you hold me like a child
Till my frozen tears fall at your feet

BMG Songs Inc/Verdugo Music/Word Music(ASCAP)

Can I please just enjoy the movie?

I'm wondering if I'll be able to go to the Narnia flick and just enjoy it, given all the hype. I've been looking forward to seeing the film for a long time, but I'm about tired of it, and it's just coming out today.

Back in November, Hollywood Jesus ran an excellent piece bythe site's senior editor Greg Wright that addressed the marketing of the movie.

It concludes with the words below.


It would also be a shame if non-Christian audiences are so put off by Christian leaders' rather silly band-wagon-hopping enthusiasm for a film they've never actually seen that they skip the film entirely and miss out on what could be the most purely enjoyable moviegoing experience of the season. Here's a personal recommendation: If you're not interested in being preached at, just tell your adult Christian friends that, no, you really don't want to attend a Narnia-themed dinner at the church, and sneak down to your local multiplex when no evangelists are looking to check out the film for yourself. You'd probably cut Saw II that much slack, anyway.

It would be equally sad, of course, if utilitarian-minded Christians missed the fact that films are good for something other than evangelism. And if you don't understand that statement, I really don't know what to say.

Can we all just forget the hype when we finally go to see the movie? I hope so. The worst thing of all would be if Disney ruined the movie's chances by making us all sick of the film before we see it, or by distracting us with a useless and tiresome sideshow. I guess it's up to us to make sure that doesn't happen.

Innocence lost

I remember when nearly every red-blooded male had "The Poster." Just when she was aging well -- if not a little weirdly -- Farrah went to some quack plastic surgeon. Why, Farrah, Why?

Embryos, births, Katrina, Christian p-rn

Scientists hoping to battle genetic diseases get approval for developing embryo from two mothers. Once again, how far is too far in the pursuit of good.

The Washington Times reports that births to unmarried women hit a record 1.4 million in 2003, while births to teens fell for the 12th consecutive years. The paper reports that social conservatives are worried because they say the out-of-wedlock births are linked to poverty and related issues.

There's an excellent collection of video clips and links to blogs criticizing the response to Katrina. They have a link for one of the most powerful moments of television I've ever seen, which happened on Meet the Press last Sunday. Aaron Broussard, president of Jefferson Parish, telling about the drowning of a woman who had been told for days that help was coming. Making it even more powerful is its contrast with the interview of the head of Homeland Security who blames the media for negative coverage. The text of the interviews with Chertoff and Broussard can be found at the Meet the Press site.

There's an excellent "Christian porn site" designed to help people break their addictions and protect themselves from porn. But this definitely isn't Focus on the Family. The two pastors who run the site now have an internet radio show and interview a major pornographer Jimmy D, who they consider a friend. Jimmy D has some interesting things to say that people would not expect to hear from a pornographer. The show can be downloaded as an mp3 file.

Penn states hosts Springsteen Symposium

As my friends know - more than they probably care to - I am a huge Bruce Springsteen fan. His music has deeply influenced my life and even played a role in my spiritual journey toward becoming a Christian. His work has become the subject of scholarly inquiry in a number of fields. Theologians also have written frequently about his use of religious imagery.

Now 14 papers will be presented on "Theology and Springsteen" at a symposium on the artist's work. The symposium to be held September 9-11 is being sponsored by the Monmouth University campus of Penn State. The papers invoke Tillich, liberation theology, narrative theology. Paul J. Contilino, co-editor of Christianity and Literature, is presenting 'The Cross of My Calling': The Christocentric imagination of Bruce Springsteen. In the paper's abstract, Contilino writes that he will be "employing William F. Lynch's influential Christ and Apollo, specifically employing his idea that the descent into the particular and finite generates the ascent upward into insight and redemption." (As any Springsteen fan would know, 'The Cross of My Calling' refers to the doomed firefighter in "The Rising" on his way to the World Trade Tower disaster: "Left the house this morning/ Bells ringing filled the air/Wearin' the cross of my calling."

In all, 150 papers are being presented under general topics that include "Redemption and Springsteen," "Comparative Studies and Springsteen," and "Springsteen as narrative poet."

Karl E. Martin, a professor of literature at Point Loma Nazarene University, will be putting his Ph.D. dissertation on Flannery O'Connor to use in a paper on Images of the Automobile in the writings of Flannery O'Connor and Bruce Springsteen.

The abstract for his paper reads:
In 1997, Springsteen said, "The really important reading that I did began in my late twenties, with authors like Flannery O'Connor. There was something in those stories of hers that I felt captured a certain part of the American character that I was interested in writing about." O'Connor presents characters who, foolishly from the narrator's perspective, associate automotive mobility with a certain kind of human freedom. Hazel Motes says, "Nobody with a good car needs to be justified." And Mr. Shiftlet, says, " . . . but the spirit, lady, is like an automobile: always on the move, always . . . " Cars play a central role in Springsteen's songs. My thesis is that Springsteen, like O'Connor, creates characters who believe they will be "saved" in some way by automotive mobility. Springsteen, like O'Connor, finds a way, from his narrative perspective and in the music, to undercut this belief in the saving power of mobility.

Speakers also will include photographer Frank Stefanko as well as rock critic and Springsteen hagiographer Dave Marsh. Participants can take a break from all the intellectual stimulation and enjoy some concerts, including Gary "U.S." Bonds, during the weekend as well. There also will be walking tours of Freehold, New Jersey, otherwise known as Mecca for those of us who love the Boss.

The full conference fee is $245, but the concerts are extra.

Faith and punditry

Ted Haggard, the president of the National Association of Evangelicals has criticized Pat Robertson's comments, although saying they were overblown. Below is a part of a post from CT.

I am confused as to how Haggard can offer a pseudo-justification for Robertson's remarks by saying he wasn't speaking in the portion of the show that was focused on "Christian exhortation" but in "another section where he's a political pundit." Hasn't it been people such as Haggard and Robertson who have been saying you can't compartmentalize your faith, including in politics?

Haggard was scheduled to travel to Venezuela to offer an apology on behalf of evangelicals. By the way, is anyone surprised that Jesse Jackson is going to travel to Venezuela to meet with the dictator? I'm so glad we have him to heal our land - and the land of others. Perhaps Jackson and Haggard will have an opportunity to chat.

On CNN yesterday, Haggard criticized the remarks, but said the criticism was overblown:

I think you have to understand the context of it. You know his program has one section of it that's a Christian exhortation, and then another section where he's a political pundit. And I think what he was saying was, we have a looming problem down south, and there are several bad options there. And he's saying maybe the least of the bad options is to do something about the dictator. …

The First Amendment is wonderful. People have free speech privileges. He wasn't writing a memo to the White House recommending a public policy decision. He was not recommending something to the State Department. He was not exposing himself sexually on the platform the way Janet Jackson did. Instead, he was having a political discussion, where they were randomly working with some ideas. For Jesse Jackson [who called for the FCC to investigate the remarks] to exaggerate it this way is just as appalling as what Pat Robertson said, I think. … We're addressing it, we're not taking it lightly. Nobody is taking it seriously as a policy issue. So the system is working. Everything is fine. Nobody's going to assassinate this man. But we do realize he is a major problem. … Pat Robertson was wrong in recommending this. He was wrong in saying it. But he was not wrong in being able to just openly discuss it the way political pundits do all the time. Now, if you take his words as from a religious Christian leader, as a recommendation, then we have a problem. But I don't think that's what he did.

Jesus says Pat got it right

In a rare and exclusive interview with Under The Radar today, Jesus said that Pat Robertson was right to call for the assassination of Venezuelan leader Hugo Chavez.

"In fact, I told him to say it," said the Prince of Peace, smiling, "Pat would never tell anybody that. He likes to keep it a secret about how close we are."

But Jesus is speaking out about the relationship, even if Robertson never would. The Lord explained that in their daily conversations, he has been able talk with Robertson in a way he has been unable to with any other person in the last 2,000 years. "He really understands me. He does have ears to hear," Jesus said.

"We'll walk through the garden on Pat's mansion and just talk about all kinds of things. Some days I'll tell him the latest scheduled date of my return. Lately we've been talking a lot about the appointment of justices to your so-called Supreme Court. Then like the other day, we'll discuss who I want assassinated."

"There's a lot of give and take," Jesus said. "I'll suggest a despicable dictator, for example, but then Pat will remind me he has millions invested in the guy's government controlled business. So Pat will suggest somebody, and then we'll talk it over and make a decision together. I really value his opinion, but again, Pat's too humble to let anyone know that."

"Pat's able to understand and even trust me like few others. I've been able to teach my good friend that what so many people believe are my words in the Bible aren't really mine at all," Jesus said. "He knows what I truly truly said."

"People don't realize that your Scriptures went through so many editors," Jesus said. He leaned forward in his seat and added with obvious irritation, "The whole process became like a bad game of post office. I said one thing, and by the time those folks were done, I had been seriously misquoted."

"Take my Sermon on the Mount for example," Jesus said. "Matthew supposedly quoted me as saying, 'love your enemies.' Who in God's name would think I'd ever say something like that!"

"What I preached to the guys - and I mean I was preaching - 'You have heard it said, love your neighbor and hate your enemy, but I say, don't just hate them. Get a group of your beer buddies together, kidnap your enemy under the cover of darkness and then crucify him! Crucify him! Crucify him!'"

"But somehow that all got twisted."

Innocent translation errors have not been the only problem in getting Jesus' real message across, he said. "There were other times when people just didn't like what I had to say and thought they knew so much better than me. You remember Peter and what a pain in the -- well I can't say it because I am Jesus after all - but you remember how he was one. Anyway, they deliberately misquoted me."

Jesus stated Mark changed his words when the Gospel writer set pen to papyrus. "That part about loving your neighbors as yourself - well, he didn't include the whole quote."

The Lord went on to explain, "What I said was 'Love your neighbor as yourself - except when your neighbor lives in a way that irritates you or says bad things about you. When that happens, get some of your beer-drinking buddies together, kidnap your neighbor under the cover of darkness and then crucify him! Crucify him! Crucify him!'"

"But Peter told Mark to change that part because it seemed so un-Messiah like," Jesus added. "Then when Matthew and Luke got lazy and copied off Mark, people took it for the Gospel truth, like it was even my personal creed or something."

"When I pointed this out to Pat, he was able to understand why I wanted Chavez assassinated," Jesus said. "I love your country far more than any other on the earth. When I saw you letting that little Venezuelan dog sneer at you like that and jacking up his oil prices, I knew I couldn't let him mock my beloved like that. He had to die."

The Son of God went on to say how frustrated he was at the attacks by the liberal media on Robertson, a one-time presidential candidate for what Jesus referred to as "God's Own Party." He added, "I mean I picked him myself, but like always, the press refused to believe and just laughed at him."

Jesus also expressed his anger that "The media really fried Pat over his comments about 9-11. Remember how he said the terrorists were instruments of my dad's judgment because of all the feminists and homosexuals running freely through your country? Well who do you think told him to say that?"

"Don't they know that when they persecute one of my followers they persecute me?"

Jesus revealed for the first time that it was the media's treatment of Robertson that led to the creation of the FOX network news channel. "Dad said he was mad as hell, and he wasn't going to take it anymore," Jesus explained. "So he told the Holy Spirit to create a fair and balanced news station. With a breath of hot air there was FOX, and dad saw that it was good."

Jesus quickly ended the interview saying he didn't want to be late for his walk with Robertson because it frustrated the televangelist. "He has such a hold over me," Jesus said.

As he left, Jesus stopped at the door, turned and faced this reporter and said with a mischievous grin, "Wait until you hear what I tell him to say today."

Where are the Democrats

Columnist David Ignatius - who I'd never heard of before - questions where are the Democrats? Good Question.

When will the party return to standing for something, putting forth proposal rather than just saying we don't like George Bush?

Jim Wallis also has written an excellent column on the topic, cautioning the Democrats to be sure they have substance behind whatever language they use to reach disaffected voters.

Clowns on the left, Jokers on the right

Clowns on the left:

Having been caught in their lies, the folks at the National Abortion Rights Action League pulled their ads which falsely claimed Supreme Court nominee John Roberts supported people who bombed abortion clinics.

Jokers on the right:

Some prominent evangelical Christians are holding their second justice Sunday to urge people to pray and fight for a (very) conservative court. It's a fine-looking group of predominately well-to-do white men. And its so nice to see Tom DeLay, who must have an extra special interest in the courts these days, lending his ethical voice.

McLaren on "Becoming Convergent"

Brian McLaren, one of the leading thinkers in the Emerging Movement has started a three-part series on Becoming Convergent. The series will extend the rest of the week.

NARAL lies about Roberts

FactCheck.org, a non-partisan organization that investigates claims from across the political and social spectrum says the National Abortion Rights Action Leagues isn't even close to telling the truth about Suprement Court nominee John Roberts.

An abortion-rights group is running an attack ad accusing Supreme Court nominee John Roberts of filing legal papers “supporting . . . a convicted clinic bomber” and of having an ideology that “leads him to excuse violence against other Americans” It shows images of a bombed clinic in Birmingham , Alabama .

The ad is false.

And the ad misleads when it says Roberts supported a clinic bomber. It is true that Roberts sided with the bomber and many other defendants in a civil case, but the case didn't deal with bombing at all. Roberts argued that abortion clinics who brought the suit had no right use an 1871 federal anti-discrimination statute against anti-abortion protesters who tried to blockade clinics. Eventually a 6-3 majority of the Supreme Court agreed, too. Roberts argued that blockades were already illegal under state law.

The images used in the ad are especially misleading. The pictures are of a clinic bombing that happened nearly seven years after Roberts signed the legal brief in question.

Anyone who is interested in investigating claims by public figures or groups should regularly check this web site or subscribe to its email list.

Wallis: Dems need substance not talk

Jim Wallis writes in a NY Times piece that Democrats need to back up any newfound god-talk with substance.

"Because the Republicans, with the help of the religious right, have captured the language of values and religion (narrowly conceived as only abortion and gay marriage), the Democrats have also been asking how to "take back the faith." But that means far more than throwing a few Bible verses into policy discussions, offering candidates some good lines from famous hymns, or teaching them how to clap at the right times in black churches. Democrats need to focus on the content of religious convictions and the values that underlie them."

I am glad to see Wallis speaking more forcefully about the Democrats and any desire to reach out to people of faith as more than just rhetoric. He has been much stronger in his criticism of the Religious Right while not attacking as publicly comments such as those made by Howard Dean and others.

Wallis has become the media darling of progressive evangelical Christians. What he has been saying isn't all that new, having been expounded on by the likes of Ron Sider and Tony Campolo for years. He just finally happens to be getting listened to. For that I am grateful.

Those who agree with Wallis also must be careful that they don't fall into the same hole as the Religious Right, who have made politics too much of its focus, according to the editor of Sojourners.

Peter Jennings

Peter Jennings will be missed.

He was an excellent journalist and one of the few mainstream journalists who tried to put news "in context."

Group: Circumcision a human rights violation

I'm guessing Abraham might have thought so at the time.

This makes for light-hearted reading because these people are serious.

Scot McKnight's blogs

Scot McKnight is a widely respected Biblical scholar who came to more people's attention with his excellent book, The Jesus Creed. He blogs daily on two different sites. Jesus Creed tends to fairly heavyweight theological discussions, often having to do with the Emergent movement. On his other Divine Hours blog, he comments on the morning liturgy put together by Phyllis Tickle. I make use of this at least once a day.

Reaction to Supreme Court Nominee

To hear the reaction of some folks, you would think that the Judge Roberts was the incarnation of Satan himself. Of course many of these critics wouldn't have liked anyone George Bush chose. Their statements against Roberts might as well have been written ahead of time. All that was needed was to fill in the blanks with the nominee's name.

It was interesting that some supposed feminists have criticized Feminists for Life, which Roberts' wife apparently belongs to, with disparaging comments about their looks. Feminism?

Posters advocating tolerance - read anti-abortionists are fascists - seem to advocate that for everyone except feminists and democrats who are pro-life.

I know nothing of whether Roberts is a good or bad choice - though it is interesting that Sandra Day O'Connor says he's a good choice.

Democrats for Life proposal

Politicians who say they want to make abortions rare but are not ready to pass legislation that would overturn Roe vs. Wade should get behind the Democrats for Life 95-10 proposal, which aims to cut abortions by 95 percent in 10 years.

The proposals are focused on more than just getting the woman through her nine months of pregnancy, but also call for assistance after the birth of her child.

Some opponents have referred to Democrats for Life as faux Democrats, but here is part of a biography of one member of the board of directors, Carol Crossed: Carol has been a lobbyist on hunger and anti-war issues. As a Native American, Carol has been active in the Indian rights movement. Award recipient: Susan B Anthony; Peaceful Solutions in Non-violence; Women's Wall of Fame; Reconciliation Network; Gaudete Medal; World Food Day Stamp, Rochester, NY, US Postal Service; She was the subject of a story that won second place in the National Catholic Press Association, 2000.

Doesn't sound like an imitation Democrat to me.

While they may quibble with some aspects of the proposal, it should be welcomed by anyone other than those who seem to think abortion is perfectly fine. It is time for people such as those mentioned to put action to their words.

I will be writing my legislator.

Cornerstone Festival

I attended the Cornerstone Festival earlier this month and had a great time. An abundance of Christian bands (How I hate that phrase but don't know what else to use) ranging in genre from Goth to Folk.

A highlight for me was discovering several new singers and bands. One of the best times with regards to music came when Ashley Cleveland on stage for several songs, including the gospel song, "I'll Fly Away." There's something about seeing a guy with spiked hair singing along that added to the evening.

Some excellent seminars as well, including several by Brian McLaren on the Emerging conversation. Had a chance to speak with him as well as Ashley Cleveland and Jars of Clay. All of them were so down to earth.

I also got turned on to foreign and classic films during discussions at one of the seminars and showings. I've checked out several from the library that I'll be watching throughout the week.

Bono expresses his faith, rove/wilson/good./evil

Some interesting posts at thinklings blog in which Bono talks explicitly about his Christian faith and need for grace. Another rocker complains Bono has been trying to convert him.

Sides are being taken in the Rove-Wilson story about Rove's supposed outing of Wilson's wife. People seem to need and enemy and victim, with one being all evil and the other all good. One is a patriot and other engaged in activity dangerous to the country.
Why do people need to have either/or. Wilson has been shown to have lied on a number of occasions. Rove is slick enough to have outed Valerie Plame under the guise of making sure a story was accurate.

Christians need to be careful of getting involved in the black or white thinking when it comes to human behavior, which is always tarnished.

I've discovered google print search engine, which allows you to search the text of books. While it has its limitations. I have found it useful.

Ashley Cleveland, Real Live Preacher

I've recently been introduced to Real Live Preacher. I have been enjoying his writings because they are honest. He recently has been sharing about his battle with depression as well as other subjects.

I've also been listening recently to Ashley Cleveland, who has such a great bluesy voice - sort of a cross between Janis Joplin and the Indigo Girls. There is raw honesty in that voice as well as the songs on her previous albums. She has won two Grammy Awards, and was the first woman to win in the Best Rock Gospel Album category.

She has reworked hymns on her incredible new album "Men and Angels Say." You can listen to clips at her website. Musicians in the contemporary Christian genre have been covering hymns with a modern musical interpretation. Hers easily is one of the best.

These are not hymns set to power chords or knock offs. Incredible musicianship and vocal styling honor the hymns while, Cleveland makes them her own - and ours.

Just a piano accompanies her on "All Creatures of Our God and King." As I listen, I picture myself looking out over the span of creation, and experiencing awe that is beyond words.

When she sings "It Is Well With My Soul," you believe it. I really wanted to sing along with this song for the first time. She brings and exuberance that I haven't heard elsewhere.

The invitiation, "Come Ye Sinners" would bring just about anybody down the aisle. You believe the promise of new life is really real.

Steve Winwood joins her on "I Need Thee Every Hour." The two attend the same church for a while in Nashville.

This is an album that captures the exuberance that life can be before our loving God. I want to stand up, arms stretched out and sing so joyfully, "Take my heart, take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above."

An excellent interview with her can be found at Christianity Today.

I'm looking forward to seeing her at the Cornerstone Festival.

Change of focus

I recently have been reading the Rule of St. Benedict online as well as an accompanying commentary. This week, the readings have focused on humility, especially with our speech.

The readings have me re-thinking this blog and asking myself questions.

Have I written with humility? Sometimes yes, and other times no.

Is the blog saying anything that can't easily be found elsewhere by people seeking to discuss many of the subjects I have written about in this blog or an earlier version? Pretty much not.

Does it contribute in a positive way to life? On occassion but too often, I can find the same things written in more depth by people who devote more time to blogging.

So I have decided:

To continue with the blog, but focusing more on promoting life and sharing information I find that is helpful in this pursuit. That may be a book or movie review, quotes I've found, a comment on culture, or even just to point to something seemingly insignificant but which just might bless someone. I'm not sure exactly how that will look, but I'm learning to trust God to lead.

Grace and peace

Identity Crisis?

There seems to be a bit of angst in the mainline and evangelical camps over how they should define themselves. Both are concerned about how they are perceived by the "outside world." The mainliners don't seem to be as concerned as the evangelicals. I'm not sure why that is, but here are some thoughts off the top of my head:

1. The evangelicals have been in the news much more, and many in the media don't understand the movement. They know a couple of faces -Falwell, Dobson, Robertson, etc, and those faces represent just a portion of people who consider themselves evangelicals. Many evangelicals are put off by the words and actions of those most in the news, and now they are running from the word "evangelical" because of the negative experiences they have had when people hear they are "one of those.'

2. This may represent, too, that evangelicalism may be a tent that is far more diverse theologically than mainline churches. I confess that I have no data to back this up.

3. Evangelicalism is hard to define, and evangelicals don't know how to define themselves, although they may claim to know one when they see one.

I proudly consider myself to be an evangelical and will write in the near future on why I am bothered that people are increasingly not wanting to be identified as such.

Here are some links of recent articles about this issue. I was intigued by the Christian Century article because I had not heard the concern over being named a mainliner. Most of the people I know who come from mainline churches have been proud to say so.

Rethinking Mainline Liberal in the Christian Century.

Growing up Evangelical in Sojourners. This is a long piece focusing on seven people's experience in the movement. All have different takes. I am still working my way through it.

Philip Yancey does an excellent job in Christianity Today in a relatively concise manner discussing the Quirky and Vibrant mosaic of evangelicalism. As stated in the article, Evangelicals are admired, mocked, praised, scorned—and all for good reason.

Colson: Felt could have stopped coverup

In an interview with Christianity Today, Chuck Colson says Mark Felt could have put an end to the Watergate had he gone to President Nixon. Colson says he would have made sure Nixon met with Felt.

Colson doesn't believe Nixon would have stopped the coverup out of a sense of morality but simply from self-interest. Had Nixon done nothing, Felt could have resigned and THEN gone public with what he knew.

Deep Throat Irony, Stein's Mind

How ironic that some of those who were in the Nixon administration are upset at Mark Felt's "improper" behavior in supplying information to Woodward and Bernstein. Chuck Colson and G. Gordon Liddy - both of whom were convicted for actions related to Watergate -- have decried Felt's actions. Patrick Buchanan has referred to Felt as a "traitor."

I love irony.

Has Stein lost his Mind: Actor, economist and social critic Ben Stein says Nixon was a noble liar and Felt, Woodward, Bernstein, et. al. are responsible for Cambodian genocide.

The article appears in the American Spectator magazine, but you have to wonder what seats Stein is watching from.

foolishly used words

A post on another blog takes a cheap shot at Priscilla Owen for attending a church that left the Episcopal church over the denomination's stance on homosexuality. The church believed it was an issue of scriptural authority.

But Mark Pritchard, who publishes Too Beautiful decides to rail against the church as "reactionary" and calls Owen a "homophobe." Seems Pritchard is the one being reactionary. Because someone appeals to scripture doesn't make them a homophobe. I know plenty of people who have worked hard on many justice issues for gays but who believe that scripture opposes sexual relationships among homosexuals. They are not "afraid" of gays.

Referring to people who appeal to scripture for their beliefs as homophobes is as helpful to the discussion as referring to male homosexuals with obscene names.

I also know of the church and the denomination it joined, the Evangelical Covenant Church, which Jim Wallis referred to as the most exciting in the country. I don't think anyone would refer to Wallis, the editor of Sojourners, as a homophobe.

Judicial Witchcraft

A judge has ordered parents in a divorce case not to educate their son in the ways of Wicca as they have been doing. The parents were barred from having the boy engage in "non-mainstream beliefs and rituals."

The parents also had been sending their son to a Catholic school, which the judge said was OK.

Perhaps the judge should read the Consitution.

Real Sex

Frederica Matthews-Green is one of my favorite writers. In a recent (lengthy) article she discusses the real meaning of sex.

Taking hints from how our bodies have been formed, Matthews-Green discusses how for the human being, the sexual act has deeper implications for us than for any other creature.

Here are a couple of quotes:

"Looking at faces meets a very deep human hunger. I think it’s significant that humans are one of the few animals capable of looking into each other’s faces during sex."

"Everything you hear in ads and entertainment is telling you that your goal is to wake up next to someone gorgeous tomorrow morning. That’s the rationale of consumer sex. But I think what humans really want is to wake up next to someone kind, fifty years from tomorrow morning."

New favorite devotional, quote site

Here's a recent sample of The Daily Dig from the Bruderhoff Community.
You can click on a devotional link that accompanies the quote.

All Things New

C. F. Blumhardt

And he who sat upon the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” - Revelation 21:5

A darkness has come over Christianity in regard to this matter of renewal. We are so easily contented, so quickly satisfied with a religiosity that makes us appear a little more decent. Yet this cannot be all there is to our faith: Everything—everything—must become new. Not just a little taste of something new, but all things new.

Democrats for Life seek to reduce abortions

I hope the rest of the party is listening and will get on board. Unlike the Republicans, who have allowed pro-choice politicians to address their national conventions, the Democrats have not allowed the opportunity among their own ranks. What they don't seem to realize is that there are plenty of us who don't consider ourselves Republicans and don't want to be equated with the Religious Right but are put off by the Democratic leadership's pandering to Planned Parenthood, etc.

I'll be looking for a group near me.

In April, Democrats For Life of America (DFLA) joined Congressmen Tim Ryan, Bart Stupak, Lincoln Davis and other pro-life Democrats at a national press conference at the Democratic National Committee to unveil an innovative abortion-reduction proposal. The proposal they call the “95-10 Initiative” was released after months of research, political outreach and planning.

The 95-10 Initiative is a comprehensive proposal of 15 different policy programs that, when fully funded and implemented in coordination with each other, will hopefully reduce the number of abortions in America by 95 percent over the next 10 years.

“The 95-10 Initiative is our number one priority. While many talk about protecting life, we’re proposing a legitimate policy initiative that will actually reduce the number of abortions in America. The 95-10 Initiative has been met favorably by both pro-life and pro-choice advocates and elected officials,” said Kristen Day, Executive Director of Democrats For Life of America.

What's a Conservative?

First Things has a lengthy article raising the question of how the conservative interests fit together.

A clipping:

Social conservatives, fiscal conservatives, libertarians, agrarians, communitarians, foreign-policy hawks—who can figure them out? Neocons and theocons and paleocons, to say nothing of soccer-mom Republicans, country-club Republicans, and just plain, garden-variety Republicans: If you read much political commentary, it must seem as though there are more ways to sort conservatives in America than there are actual conservatives to be sorted.

And what about the issues for which these different conservatives care? Abortion, tax cuts, school vouchers, judicial overreach, the government’s bloated budget, bioethics, homosexual marriage, the creation of democracies in the Middle East, federalism, immigration, the restoration of religion in the public square—on and on. They bear no more than the vaguest family resemblance: second or third cousins, shirt-tail kin at best.

Back during the Cold War, conservatives could all be counted upon at least to share an opposition to communism, while various writers—from Friedrich Hayek and Ludwig von Mises to Russell Kirk and Michael Oakeshott—sought something resembling a unifying theory through the rich pages of Adam Smith’s economics and the deep prose of Edmund Burke’s traditionalism.

What now remains? Hardly a single concern is common to everyone labeled a conservative, and the chance of finding a meaningful pattern in the Right’s political muddle appears hopelessly remote.